9 months

So it has been a while since I last blogged! I plead busy-ness! In the past three months a lot has happened. I've attended two more births as a doula and gotten more involved in the birth community. I'm about ready to submit my certification paperwork to DONA.

Daniel and Lily have both started to do many new things! If you follow me on Facebook you are probably kept in the loop for the most part.

Daniel turned 9 months old on the tenth. He is doing just awesomely. Both his developmental pediatrician and his regular pediatrician are just thrilled with his progress so far.

Stuff Daniel is doing since the last blog:
- sitting unassisted
- getting into sitting unassisted
- army crawling
- feeding himself...the latest...last night he fed himself some thinly sliced cheese. He loved it!
- drinking from a straw cup
- we are about 80% sure he is saying "Dada" to refer to Joe. I am about ready to write it in his baby book as his first word.
- sitting up for baths in the bathtub (due to the slippery-ness this is a harder feat than sitting on land!)
- has sprouted his first tooth (one of the bottom middles)
- Signing "milk"--he has not done any other signs yet.
- Giving kisses!

So yes, he is doing great. :-)

Stuff Lily is doing since the last blog:
- Starting to read!! We give her a sticker every night for every word she sounds out by herself.
- Related, she writes letters. She can make most letters herself and can write her name.
- She can also do some simple math in her head (addition and subtraction in units smaller than 10). We haven't worked with her as much on this so this is mostly her...she seems math inclined.
- Still doing ballet. Recital is coming up soon!
- She is just the best big sister ever!! We really have zero jealousy issues with the kids. I know it might not last but I am just so enjoying their sibling relationship right now.
- (this is a big one) Has started to spit her toothpaste out after brushing her teeth! I thought this one would never happen.
- She is the one who reminds us to pray before meals. It is really cute. She knows all the words to several prayers: Our Father, Hail Mary, Guardian Angel Prayer, and the Prayer Before Meals. I'm thinking about working with her on memorizing some poetry because her memory is so good.

Tangent, but related: when we were watching the election of Pope Francis, and he came out on the balcony and asked everyone to say an Our Father, Hail Mary, etc., Lily objected to his choice of those prayers. She wanted to say the Meal Prayer (Bless us O Lord...) instead. It was pretty funny.

I really do want to keep up on this blog, but it is hard to find time to sit down to do it. I am going to try harder because I do like having this connection to those of you who don't live close to us!! Hope to blog again soon.

6 Months

Daniel was six months old on Monday!!!

We had a 6 month well baby visit this morning and he is weighing in at 17 lbs 12 oz. His weight gain finally seems to be slowing down a bit, and honestly I am a bit relieved!

I was a little worried about him getting exceptionally large when we start solids (next week!!!!) especially since we will be starting with delicious fatty foods like avocado to support brain growth. Although Daniel is not sitting up unassisted yet he is definitely showing other signs of being ready for solid foods....like grabbing a banana out of my hand and sticking it in his mouth!! I doubt he ingested much, but he definitely got a taste! He also likes to watch us eat and will follow a fork or spoon with his eyes from the plate to our mouths. I hope these are all good signs that he will love eating.

A little blurry, but a good example of how Daniel is able to sit these days.

Daniel is still mostly on track with his baby milestones. The biggest difference I see (compared to Lily as a baby) in him right now is his muscle tone in his trunk. He is very unsteady and I think it will probably be several months until he sits unassisted. Lily was sitting as Daniel is sitting currently (and doing it better) at around 5 months of age. I have pictures of her from her first Christmas sitting just like this!

At the doctor we also decided to get a CBC drawn and a thyroid panel. Children with Ds have an increased chance of thyroid problems so it is good to get it checked out. After this we will get that panel run at a year and then yearly thereafter. We should know by the end of the week if all is well.

Daniel was not so thrilled with getting his blood drawn. We did find out that he has better veins in his right arm, just like Mommy! It brought back a lot of memories of vials and vials of blood being drawn from him when he was just a newborn. I got much more emotional over it than I thought I would. He was quite upset, and stayed upset for about an hour afterward.

Lily still cannot smile like a normal person. I have no idea what she thinks she was doing!

These pictures were actually taken before Daniel could catch a nap after the blood draw experience, and you can totally tell how tired and subdued he is just by these pictures!! As opposed to...

Nakie time!

...this picture from last night! He has such a personality. Everyone who knows him agrees that when he smiles, he smiles with his whole body.

Daniel and I met another milestone together today. He has now been exclusively breastfed for six months. I am so grateful that we were able to breastfeed. I have no doubts that this will benefit him long term and it has been so good for our mama/baby bond, especially in those early days when we felt like our world had been turned upside down! His OT has already seen some awesome benefits of breastfeeding when she was evaluating him in preparation for beginning solid foods next week. As of right now, she sees no difference in him orally from a typical baby. This is AWESOME and pretty much attributable to breastfeeding entirely. :-)

Daniel's mouth being evaluated by our beloved OT, Miss Susie.

As far as the future health concerns go, we are still working on getting his hearing checked again by the end of the year. I am also planning on pushing hard to get speech therapy for him starting at the beginning of the year. Although Daniel is vocalizing in an age appropriate way and we have no current concerns, I really want to focus on speech with him. I am honestly not too worried about the age he is when he learns to sit up/crawl/walk. I know he will do those things eventually. What I really want is to communicate with him. So we're going to be starting next year with that goal in mind.

These past few months have been a little crazy and I haven't really had the time (or the desire when I did have a few minutes of free time) to sit in front of the computer and make updates. There are still a few things I wanted to update everyone on, so maybe I will try to play catch up with the blog as soon as Joe has his winter break, starting the 21rst. My schedule starts to slow WAY down at that point!!! Love to you all!

Although Daniel isn't looking at the camera, I couldn't leave you without a good picture of Miss Lily!! Only genuine smile I got today for the camera.

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor present things, nor future things, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8: 38-9

Harvest Festival!

Some pictures from our weekend so far. Hopefully we will do more fun things tonight! Daniel is still very croupy so we are trying to keep it relaxed around here.

We took the kids to a Harvest Festival hosted by a nearby church.

Lily enjoyed a train ride!

Love her face!

Looking around!

The aftermath.

Hope you all have an awesome weekend!

So what is that Doula thing you're doing?

If you didn't know, I attended a four-day DONA workshop over this past weekend as part of my training and requirements to become a certified birth doula. It was amazing. Being in a room for four days surrounded by such a diverse, inspiring group of women is something I will never forget. Every single woman in the room in some way or another humbled me by their knowledge or their spirit or their kindness. We had so much to learn from one another and we were all so hungry for more information. We shared a passion for one thing: supporting and serving mothers and fathers in their quest to have the birth experience that they desire. I will hold this experience in my heart for a long time, and I am still running on a high!

Please watch the following video to find out more about what a doula does (and doesn't) do!



My very first client is due soon, so I'm diving in head first! I am very excited to transition to this new career and way of life, and so thankful for the support of my family and friends as I follow my dreams.

:-)

"There is a secret in our culture, and it’s not that birth is painful. It’s that women are strong.”        -Laura Stavoe Harm

Daniel's diagnosis story - Part 2

I wrote the following journal entry when I was a little over five weeks pregnant, obviously too early for any sort of screening test. I edited this a little for privacy reasons but otherwise it is exactly as written on that date. Some of what I wrote is not person-first language, but I've preserved it as written to keep it as accurate as possible.

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October 18, 2011

Baby Signs

I've kind of hesitated to write about this because I know a number of people reading this don't believe in God, or if they do, they don't believe God can send you signs. But I feel like I need to get it down, so if it ends up happening, other people will know and I won't feel (too) crazy.

I have strange feeling that God is going to give us a special needs baby at some point. I don't know if it'll be this baby. I just want to document some stuff.

A few weeks before we conceived this baby, Joe and I were talking, and I asked him,

"Do you ever feel like God would trust you with a special needs child?" I'd had a weird feeling about it for a few weeks and I wanted to talk to him about it.

A few days after I got the positive test, I was walking Kirby with Lily in the stroller, and we came across another family (mom, two boys of different ages) who were also walking their dog. One of the boys was obviously special needs. He was so sweet though. He asked me about Kirby and about Lily. This is a walk I have taken dozens of times, with and without Kirby/Lily, and I had never met this family before.

Today when I turned on the radio (I usually listen to either EWTN radio or NPR in the car, I'm not into the music on the radio), Mother Angelica's show was on. They were talking about babies who get aborted because of their special needs. I got chills throughout my body when I heard what she was talking about. The show was actually really good.

I have no idea if God is trying to tell me something or not. I realize to some of you I sound a little...crazy. But like I said, I wanted to get this down. If our baby ends up having a disability of some kind, I want to be able to look back and see that God meant it to be that way, and that He has a plan.

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I shared this journal entry with a few very close friends and promptly forgot all about it. Mostly. I thought about it a little at my ~20 week ultrasound, and again at my 34 week ultrasound. I remember the ultrasound technician telling me all about how beautiful his heart was, and thinking to myself, "Well, at least it isn't Down syndrome." I think in my heart I knew my child would have a disability...I knew comparatively little about Ds at that point, but I did know that it could involve heart defects. I had no idea how common it is to have perfect ultrasounds, even screening ultrasounds (which we didn't have) and still end up with a sweet baby with an extra chromosome.

The day after Daniel was born my doula Jenny (who also happens to be a midwife) visited us in the hospital. I was still having fears about Daniel, and was still being reassured by Joe. When Jenny arrived, Joe still had not arrived back at the hospital from an errand home to let Kirby (our dog) out, so we were alone. Jenny held Daniel and checked him over so gently and tenderly. I remember our conversation going a little like this:

J: "He has a simian line on his hand."

E: "Does that mean anything?"

(long pause)

J: "Sometimes. He has such interesting eyes."

(I think at this point I started to panic a little inside because I was starting to realize what I thought was an OCD-like obsession had been validated in some way.)

J: "Has the pediatrician been in to look at him?"

E: "Yes."

I don't remember how our conversation went after this, but Daniel's unique features didn't come up again.

And the pediatrician had been to look at Daniel. The night before, the same day Daniel had been born, the pediatrician had been in to see him, and hadn't said that anything was amiss.

Immediately after Jenny left I googled "simian line." And as soon as I read what I read, I think I knew. I knew that something was different about Daniel, and I knew it couldn't be one of the more life threatening options, because he was nursing so well and doing well otherwise.

As soon as Joe got back, I shared the info with him. I knew the pediatrician would be in again soon and I asked Joe to bring Daniel's simian line to the pediatrician's attention. I felt like I had to get in the shower. So I did, and the pediatrician arrived while I was in there. Joe peeked his head in and asked me to get out. The pediatrician wanted to talk to us.

When I was getting dressed, I thought to myself,

"I will always remember what I was wearing when they told me my son has Down syndrome."

It was a blue nightgown. And that is exactly what happened.

I could tell you a lot about what happened next.

I could tell you in detail how we cried, and how my husband said so many absolutely wonderful things about our son that for the first time in my life I knew what it was like to be so proud of my husband that I thought I might die on the spot for love of him.

I could talk about telling my mom and stepdad that night about the pediatrician's diagnosis, how hard it was to say the words "Down syndrome" for the first time out loud, and how the first words out of my mouth afterward were, "I am so afraid that people won't see how special he is!" And how they lovingly reassured me.

I could tell you about the woman who walked into my stepdad's office the very next day with her husband, wanting to work on financial planning issues concerning her son with Down syndrome.

I could write about the first time I took Daniel to Mass, noticing the responsorial Psalm was Psalm 139, and feeling a rush of love from God, feeling like He was holding us in the palm of His hand.

I could talk about a million coincidences, "signs" from God, chance meetings, kind strangers, poems and songs out of the blue. I could tell you about the kindness of the pediatrician in the hospital. I could tell you how not ONE single person who loves us ever said the words "I'm sorry."

I could talk about how I've never felt closer to God in my life than I have since Daniel was born.

But I'm not going to elaborate about any of those things. Some of those things would make wonderful stories, but the story of Daniel having Down syndrome isn't really my story to tell.

It is his. And so far I am feeling so privileged to be a part of Daniel's story.

"For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected when received with thanksgiving."
1 Timothy 4:4

31 for 21, day 9: Variations on a Theme

As I've been taking photos the last few months, a theme in our household really stood out to me and I thought it might make good material for a more "fun" blog entry. Enjoy!

"I set my rainbow in the clouds to serve as as a sign of my covenant between me and the earth."

-Genesis 9:13

31 for 21, day 8: A Lily Day

Today was another day I tried to make fun for Miss Lily. She has been feeling pretty badly lately due to allergies (yes she is medicated) so she was not in the best of moods today, but I tried to ignore her ornery behavior and just go with it.

This morning we took an hour long walk on a trail near our house. Despite it being 70 degrees I had no desire to babywear, so stroller it was.

Lily was indispensable in regard to keeping Daniel from fussing (he hates the stroller/carseat)!

Afterwards we indulged in our favorite fast food guilty pleasure location, followed by some time in the playscape. :-)

We also made a Target run and I took Lily to her make-up ballet class (she missed on Friday due to her fever Thursday night). I tried to get pictures at ballet but they all turned out awful. All in all, it was a good day and I did get a lot of time in for Daniel's therapies as well, especially during ballet class! I was able to multitask by doing therapy stuff with him and watching her dance at the same time. I also managed to make dinner tonight and do a fair amount of house cleaning! Go me!

Till tomorrow!